Friday, August 5, 2011

Being FAT is NOT wassup :(

Hey guys,

If you are subbed to my YT Channel "Where the fun never Stops"  then you know I have been fighting the battle of the bulge. Well, that bitch won! Ugh! I am so disgusted I can hardly contain myself. Without getting into a long drawn out story that is likely to cause me to burst out in tears, I had lost 125 lbs on the Atkins Diet about 3 years ago. Well, since then, I gained back 100 of those lbs. I know, I know! WTF!! Well, apparently I am a damn fool and once I slid into some size 11 jeans I thought I was THE SHYT so no need to watch what I ate. No matter how I tried to monitor my own eating, it was to no avail. To say I sabotaged myself is a great fucking understatement. Sickening to even type.

Anywho, yesterday I got on the scale and promptly hunched over, convulsed in tears. I mean, the ugly cry! I am so disappointed in myself but rather than continue to feel worse about myself, which in turn causes me to eat MORE, I decided that I am back on the diet! NO CHEATING! I also decided to journal what I eat daily and to help myself stay accountable since clearly I am not strong enough to do it myself, I will post a weekly blog posting telling the world what I ate, lost and exercised for that week! Yep, I am officially outing myself. Sad that it has to come to this but, it has!

So, the actual week will begin on Thursday August 11th, so expect my first posting on August 12th, as I gave myself a few days to get into the swing of no carbs again.

Yep! I am serious, needing encouragement and motivation and ready to go! I will be damned if I use the extended belt on a plane or GOD forbid be buried in a piano box!

Ugh! That is the word for the day. I ate a few carbs yesterday being that the only vegetable I had in the house was corn, but based on the fact that I have about 3 loaves of bread, bags of rice and potatoes everywhere, I won't beat myself up about it. So, today is day 2 and so far as I write this I have not had any carbs. Small victory but victory indeed!

Help me stay motivated, ask me if I ate any carbs and help me keep me (O.O) accountable.

Ugh!

Love,
Jahlicia <3

9 comments:

  1. I applaud your honesty with yourself and all of us. Beating yourself up or eating to feel better never helps, so great job for not going that route. As a word of encouragement, try not to look at your eating as a diet, but a lifestyle. Diet often implies something that will end, whereas, lifestyle is more long term, life, mind you. In order to be successful, you need to stock your house with those good for you foods/snacks so that you do not give in out of lack/desperation. Personally, I love low carb, it rocks and it keeps me satisfied, no cravings. Not that I monitor my weight, as that is not my reason for low carb-ing, but i weigh less now than I did in high school : ), with better muscle tone. I am rooting for you. You can and will do it.

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  2. @tmice826 thanks so much for the feedback! I feel like all I say to you is ur absolutely right, but again your absolutely right!
    I tend to fall back into this "lifestyle" because of the no cravings aspect as willpower is non existent for me in the past. no worries as I am speaking it into existence for the present and future. Thanks again and hugz!! I can do it :o)

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  3. Girl, I am so proud of you and your 'sharing' is comendable! We all struggle with something and it's nothing to be ashamed of! I will be one of your cheerleaders! You can and will acomplish your goals! :-)
    On top of your honesty I found your post to be hilarious in your descriptions! You may need to consider being a stand up comic. Peace and Blessings!!!! You go girl!

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  4. Thanks for sharing your journey! It takes courage to do this weight loss thing with eyes looking at you but you're doing it AND you have a plan. Definitely agree with TMICE - it's a lifestyle change. It's not an easy journey as you know but IT IS WORTH IT! You've got this!

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  5. @Rockin Robin Thanks so much gurl! I def need and apreciluv ur support! I can do it :) Im telling myself that everyday!

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  6. @I_amEatingRight I know what you mean! I have started saying lifestyle change and it does make it a bit easier to digest! Thanks for the support cause I sure will need it! Hugz!

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  7. I know you can do it girl!!!

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  8. I am the same way, my weight has been up and down for years. Right now i use fatsecret.com to track my eating and my workouts. I can't give up junk food. Just stay focused on your goal, you'll lose it again.

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  9. It really helps knowing its not just me :) Thanks for the tip, I need a good tracker to keep my figures straight! Thanks for the encouragement and same to you! We can do it!!

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